An Overwhelming Feeling

Sunday we went to a "hands on" type of museum with the children. I found out they were having free admission, but so did everyone else. Not only was it packed but we waited about 20 minutes in line just to get in! As I stood there in line I thought to myself that perhaps we should have just stayed home. The overwhelming feeling of how I was going to deal with all 5 children among all these people just rose within me. And to top it all off, the baby still needed to be nursed...

It has been 2 days since then and I can truly say that I have felt that overwhelming feeling come and go. I sincerely think that it is my hormones because it happens about once a month or so. The funny thing about it is that nothing too irregular has changed. Planning for the new school year has been on my mind. Decisions about activities we will participate in and not have been swirling through my thoughts. The laundry keeps coming without a break in sight, and there is still my history timeline to put up.

This morning I looked at my 2 1/2 yr old as I was brushing her teeth and decided to just have an adult conversation with her. It went something like this:

" 2 yr. old, Mommy is not superwoman."(This I said in a very sweet voice because I wanted to see her response.)

She looked at me before I stuck the toothbrush in her mouth and said,

"No, your Lwinda."

She was so right. She could have said I was Mommy, but she chose her words well. I'm just Linda. A child of God, a wife, a mother, a homeschooler, and a woman. Non of us are superwoman, and all of us have that overwhelming feeling at times.

Overwhelming feelings come and go. I breathe through them. I slow way down when I feel them pull my breath away. The laundry isn't going anywhere, and the children one day will grow. A day or two break from our schedule won't hurt the children's education, and eating on paper plates for dinner tonight isn't going to hurt my husband's feelings. It gives me time to look at our family, to look at my heart, and focus on what's really important.

Our trip to the fun museum turned out great after all. I decided to slow way down, and look at each display for a little while. I nursed the baby during the first display while the children played with the water boats in the miniature river canals. Soon we moved on to the next display and a feeling of wellness returned. My eyes were not looking at the crowd anymore. They were focused with a purpose. We were enjoying our time there. And you know what? The overwhelming feeling I had was OK to have, because after all, it was just that- a feeling.