A Trusting Matter..

We Cry Out
Father of life, seated on Your throne of grace
It's only by Your mercy we are saved
Lord, You have said if we call upon Your Name
We and our families will be saved

So we cry out Your Name,
El Shaddai, God of grace
Lord Most High, Jesus Christ
We rely on Your grace,
Adonai, crowned in praise
Lord Most High, Jesus Christ

Father of love, never failing to forgive
Each moment is a gift from You to live
We're only here to tell the world about Your grace
Until the day You take us all away

We will cry out Your Name,
El Shaddai, God of grace
Lord Most High, Jesus Christ
We rely on Your grace,
Adonai, crowned in praise
Lord Most High, Jesus Christ

O, so we cry out Your Name,
El Shaddai, God of grace
Lord Most High, Jesus Christ
We rely on Your grace,
Adonai, crowned in praise
Lord Most High, Jesus Christ

I have added this song to the Songs I like... on the bottom sidebar. It is a gentle reminder to myself that He is my all in all and I will hold on to Him as an anchor to my soul.

Our little 1 1/2 yr. old is in the hospital. I seems a lot of people are sick lately. His white blood cell count is quite high and he has tonsilitis. The doctor thought it would be best to try antibiotics through an IV.

A Big Thought on Music and Prose

Here's a little bit of something to chew on....

"Lord, what music hast thou provided for thy saints in heaven, when thou affordest bad men such music on earth....."

~Walton

The Sounds of Music

I live in a world full of sounds of music to my ears.
The melodies come quickly releasing feelings I can hear.
It is the sound that keeps me thinking,
The melodious waves that capture more than just a tune.
It is as if my brain is drawn upon the moving words.
As if my heart can hear beyond its orchestrated chords.

I see it now, reflected more within my offspring
For she hears it too.
The echoes float within her,
And desperately escape her soul.
Perhaps, if harnessed better,
Hers will produce a wonderful work.
One that will glorify God and cause Him to say,
“It is good.”


This is dedicated to my first daughter.

With Love,

Dear Journal Letter (a casually long update)

Dear Journal,

I've been wanting to write but I've had all kinds of thoughts running through this mind of mine. Topics ranging from how I'm going to teach Lewis and Clark to 1st and 2ND graders in our co-op to Suzuki piano becoming more Traditional to the definition of apostasy. You see, how could you possibly come up with a sensible post? My days go from good when I'm caught up with my laundry and the downstairs is organized and tidy to a poem that describes my heart is heavy and I need to take my cares to the Lord. And yet in all this storm raging within me, I find my Savior cares so much for me.

Co-op has been good this year considering I have 3 children to home school and toddlers to keep me busy. The prep time for this one hour class hasn't been hard and I've really enjoyed teaching them. I'm sharing our teaching with another dear mom who I'll alternate every 7 weeks with. So two more turns of mine and then she'll have to do the prep work, at least for 7 weeks. We've learned so far about what an explorer is, Marco Polo, C. Columbus, H. Cortes, and Capt. Cook. I've learned a few things along the way. I've been reminded of a few things -those being that greed is a great motivator and inflicter of sorrow, that perseverance and good workmanship brings forth great things, and that there is a great will to live beyond the mundane.

Music has lately troubled my heart torn by what I feel would be most appropriate and an excellent teacher who has a different opinion than I. We began Suzuki piano when my little boy was 5. If I had to do it all over again, I would have waiting till he was 7. He has had good piano theory and very good ear training. But alas, we are moving to a more traditional approach. We
have decided to drop the Suzuki Vol. 2 book and pay more emphasis on his reading. His teacher is really a good teacher and has the better in mind for him. But the Suzuki method, I feel requires more time than I have to give now, plus I want his reading to progress further on. She wants him to have the freedom to untimidly move about the keyboard, to be able to feel the music. Who would know that this would be such an issue in my heart, to play by ear or read the music? She has began to introduce an option that I'm beginning to see as a wonderful compromise. He's in the process of memorizing A Gift to Be Simple and Kumbayah after the fact that he can play them both fluently by reading the music.

It seems that it has been so long since I've spoken to anyone about Apostasy, that I kind of forgot the exact meaning of the word. I had to look it up in the dictionary. I knew it either meant someone who was saved and left the truth or I was thinking it might be someone who knew better and was teaching false doctrine. Turns out that it was someone leaving the truth.
I read 1st and parts of 2ND Peter along with Jude today. The thoughts that stuck in my mind was the dog going back to its vomit, and having been better not to have known of the truth and left it since the end of apostasy is worse.
I'm not a believer that once you're saved - you're always going to be saved. I believe you can walk away from God. I also believe someone who has genuinely been born again will have quite a time leaving the Savior. For He will not easily let you go. He tugs at your heart through His Spirit. But His Spirit can only be grieved so long. That makes apostasy ever so sadder I think.
I've been thinking about that and the parallel of marriage came into my mind. Salvation is like that vow of marriage. Perhaps they forget their first love. It is a decision to stay married. A decision to be faithful to the groom. A choice made out of love for Him who first loved me. When you break the vow, you've committed adultery and unless you make things right with the groom, you are an adulteress. The Bible tells us about no adulterers entering into Heaven. Or perhaps it was idolatry or.....
The prophet Hosea comes to mind. He loved Gomer yet she would not.
This apostasy that I speak about could happen to me, to my heart. Would I go back to the heart I had previously to coming to Christ? I could if my heart gets hard. I could if my eyes waxed dull. I could if my love turns to other and I forget the Savior. And the scary thing is that it all could happen and I could remain in church. A waterless cloud with no savour, with withered fruit that has no roots, or perhaps I could leave it all and start over -but that I don't know how to do. For how would I erase the feeling of His presence or face life all be myself again. It could happen, and if it did, mark that I would be what is called an Apostate.

A little Spanish..

I have been looking over my bookshelves because tomorrow is our area's curriculum sale. I've got 2 medium boxes full of stuff to sell. I can't wait! This is definitely better than shopping for clothes for me.
Well, as I was looking through books and convincing myself that I would never get around to using this and that I found a Spanish song typed out on white copy paper. Would you believe that someone gave me the words to that song about 12 yrs ago or so? And that I still have it?

I'm going to post it with the translation or a close translation to the verses:

Title: Que Lindo Es Mi Cristo
My Christ is so Beautiful

Verse 1
Ques lindo es mi Cristo,
My Christ is so Beautiful.
Cuan Grande es su Amor,
Whose love is so grand,

Yo andaba perdido, El vino y me ayo.
I wondered lost, He rescued me.

Con sus tiernas manos, el me acaricio,
With His tender hands, he touched me.

Tomo mi en sus brazos, y alli me arrullo.
He took me in His arms, and there cradled me so.

Chorus
Que dulces caricias, las the Salvador
How sweet are the dealings, the ones from the Saviour.

Caricias que llenan mi alma de Amor.
Dealings that fill my soul with Love.

Su vos me asegura, conmigo esta,
His voice reassures me ,that with me He abides,

Esta para siempre, por la Eternidad.
He's with me forever, through Eternity.


Verse 2
Que lindo es mi Cristo,
My Christ is so Beautiful.
Cuan grande es su Amor.
Whose love is so grand,

Que diste tu vida, por mi pecador,
You gave your life, for me- a sinner.

Dejaste tu Trono, por venir aqui,
Leaving your throne, to come down here,

Buscando perdidos, me encontraste a mi.
Buscando perdidos, me encontraste a mi.
Looking for lost ones,... you found me.
Looking for lost ones,... you found me.

It doesn't sound really swell in English, but in Spanish there is a passion of beauty in that song, and a sweet reminder of small beginnings.

A little story ...Anonymous and an old song.

I have been meaning to blog this. I wrote it down in the back page of my Bible many years ago. I think it's something I heard over the pulpit. I thought about it again this morning and thought I'd go ahead and share it.

Once there was a boy who stood on the beach collecting the starfish that the ocean's waves had brought to shore. As he found each starfish he would carefully throw it back into the depth of the sea. A man came over to the boy. Puzzled at the boy's action he said, "Boy, why do you even bother. There's so many thousands of starfish and only one of you. It doesn't really matter if you save a couple when thousands are lost everyday!"
At this the boy picked up a starfish and threw it far into the ocean. Looking at the man he replied, " It mattered to that one!"

I also heard a song yesterday called I See a Crimson Stream. Here's one of the verses that touched my heart.

When gloom and sadness whisper
You've sin'd no use to pray,
I look away to Jesus,
And He tells me to say:

I see a crimson stream of blood,
It flows from Calvary,
Its waves which reach the throne of God,
Are sweeping over me.

That's really so good to my heart that it makes me want to pray!

The Sound of Music

I've often thought what the world would be like if I couldn't hear anything. No words, no sound to reach within my heart and draw out its emotions. For someone like me, it would be torture. I love to sing. I remember the love songs my mom use to listen to when I was little, about 6 years old. The emotions of the melody. I can still hum the melody to one of those songs. It was impressed within my memory. And I've often caught myself over the years composing words to go along with it.
Music is a powerful tool for it penetrates within. It can be so useful to teach, and to encourage" ...making melodies in your heart...". Oh, to not hear it would be to not feel for me!
But music has a way with our nature. It can grasp the lust of the flesh and run. It can cause the pride of life to rise and it can call our other senses away from our intentional thoughts about God.

What shall I do? For the sounds of music are everywhere. And what then will I allow my ears to hear?

I Cor. 6:12 says " All things are lawful unto me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any."

So the question I need to ask is, "Does it bring honor to God? If it is secular music, would it dishonor the Lord?
Or would it draw us away? Would it seep deep into the soul and cause our nature to put God's desires for us aside?"

Music has a way of leading people to altars of intentions. I want it to lead me to Heaven's bright shores.